Before I begin my non sequitur stream of consciousness, I should tell you that this is not a post about deodorant. It’s actually a post about online shopping…and spending life indoors.
Don’t worry, I smell just fine…I promise. But if I thought I was running low on some deodorant and a was bit tight on time, why not just order it off the internet? So what would I normally do, go all the way to CVS? And what do I do if when I get there, CVS is out of my favorite kind of deodorant. And you know what? I can’t decide if I want to use my usual Old Spice Original deodorant or switch to something like Tom’s Natural Mountain Spring deodorant. Five and a half months ago I stopped eating meat and fish, my mom has constantly reminded me to only eat organic fruits and vegetables….maybe I need a more natural deodorant? ….But I don’t know if this Tom’s stuff even works. I doubt any of the employees at CVS have even tried all of the deodorants, there’s probably nobody I can ask there. I don’t even know what the ingredients are. And oh shoot! They don’t even sell it at CVS. I wonder where I can get it, and I wonder if that place will also sell Old Spice so I can look at them both and compare side by side. What if I just go online and check out the differences there? And hey, maybe there will be reviews that can tell me how good the deodorant is.
So it Turns out there are a lot of reviews like this one. I guess Tom’s is more of an “odorant” than a “de-odorant.” Man I really dodged a bullet there! And I saved an almost wasted $12.23. On a college budget, that doesn’t go unnoticed. Okay, so it looks like I probably won’t go ahead and buy Tom’s deodorant, but my point still stands. If the reviews weren’t so compelling I might have actually bought this product. In fact, before Amazon I probably would have bought this product (only once it seems).
So what was the point of that thought stream? That was the thought stream of someone about to enter the great new world of online shopping for basic needs. This summer I became an avid online shopper – not an addict, more of a casual user. At a certain point in the summer I was pulling 18 hour days at work and even spending some time in the office over the weekend. Not only did I lose 20 pounds from not eating throughout the day, I started to run out of things like protein powder, clean clothes (need to be dry-cleaned!) fruit, toothpaste, and you guessed it…deodorant. What do all of these things not have in common? They’re often found at different stores from one another. After going to the gym, I barely had time to eat and sleep, let alone go to three different stores and pick up my supplies.
What was my solution? I joined amazon prime and started ordering off the internet. Two days later I had almost forgotten I had ordered these goodies when they mysteriously showed up at my door, hassle free! Now when I need some my B12, calcium, and iron vitamin capsules, I can just order them off of this nifty online retailer –amazon.com – and they show up before I would even have the chance to get to the store. The key to all of this is of course, the Amazon Prime membership. The members get free two day shipping on all prime eligible products, which make up the lion’s share of relevant product listings on the website. Estimates say that amazon prime customers may purchase more than double that of their non-prime counterparts.
So, prime customers like myself are using Amazon to order their basic necessities at home. For a while now, you’ve been able to setup a recurring order system, This allows me to order a new package of laundry detergent every month, or a new case of gatorade every two weeks. What I never liked about this system is that my preferences are volatile and this kind of setup is likely to experience over and under subscription as I consume at varying rates.
Amazon’s answer to this problem is the Amazon dash Button. This button allows me to reorder a specific household item by merely clicking a button when I notice that I’m running low – warning: keep away from children – . As spooky as it may be to press a button on my wall and have Amazon order me a new package of coffee packets using all of my credit card information, the system makes sense for the busy man. The internet has become so effective that I can get almost anything I want mailed to me (even illicit materials if I were to switch on my TOR Browser and peruse the Dark Web).
Amazon still hasn’t solved my dry-cleaning problem as far as I know, but I’m sure they will eventually. For now, It’s 2016 and there’s never been a better time to be indoors. And remember, you’re not a recluse as long as you portray an active life on Instagram.